RHNY: Separated at Birth?

Heidi Fleiss (left) & Kelly Killoren Bensimon (right)

Just sayin'...

RHNY: Kelly & The Jilted Moron

"I don't even know if I qualify him as lover. How about a jilted moron?"
- Ed Hayes, attorney for Ms. Bensimon

So during the RHNY reunion special Andy Cohen talks to Kelly about the domestic violence allegations brought against her. Watch this preview clip and join me at below.

• He came to my house.
• I said please leave.
  
• He wouldn't leave.
  
• Then he walks to the police precinct and sits with the detective.
  

Wait, huh?? I'm confused. So how/when did you bust Nick (the jilted moron) Stefanov's face up? Was there some sort of edit? That a pretty major gap in your re-telling of the events.

What's with your tissue issue? They were trying to be nice. Little Miss Pouty-Puss.

Very bizarre.

RHNY: Kelly & Max- A Love Affair (with publicity)

"Do guys like me for me, or do they want to come to a party with me?"
- Kelly Bensimon from her Bravo Blog

Hmmm, I don't know Kelly. Why don't you tell us?

So, Kelly shows up with her “boyfriend”, actor Max Palacio to her 41st birthday party on Friday at The Gates. However, the rumor is they barely spoke at all during the party. Palacio spent more time with his arm around some German model!

That is, until photographers started snapping Kelly with her birthday cupcakes (iced with a picture of her in a bathing suit- Gag!). Suddenly, Palacio was at her side —getting into a flirty frosting fight for the lensmen. When the snapping stopped, they separated again. Max left on his own.

But then, as Bensimon reminded us a few days earlier, “Housewives” isn’t a reality show, “It’s surreality. The minute there’s a camera on you, it’s not real. The thing I like about it is they make you into a chameleon”.

You say chameleon, I say big, phoney, faker. Tomato, Tomahto!

(Source: Rush & Molloy)

RHNY: Who is Jill Zarin's Jeweler?

Oh that Jill Zarin loves her some bling doesn't she?
In almost every episode there's been some reference made about Jill's jewels. There was Betheny dipping into Jill's overstuffed jewelry box while doing her now infamous impression of Jill. We've heard Jill herself her talking about her massive diamond rings- The Baby and The Momma (note: given the size of The Baby it's an absolute certainty you'd need to do strength training before being able to lug around around The Momma). When we saw Jill out with Kelly purchasing the $16,000.00 B-bag (Béatrice Amblard custom handbag) for her birthday she lets Kelly know, "This gift is 'moderate' and that considering the economy, I didn't think we should spend a lot. Last year was big jewelry".

So where does Jill get these big fabulous baubles? From Jeweler Jeri Cohen of Jeri Cohen's Fine Jewelry. Jeri's been in the jewelry biz for 20 years and has a boutique, located in Trump Plaza (3rd Ave. @ 61st NYC). She specializes in diamonds and has gained particular notoriety for her engagement rings (momma? baby?) and her butterfly and flower collection.

Meet Jeri in the preview clip for tomorrow nights finale show as Jill and Kelly stop in to pick up jewelry for a charity event.


Isn't she adorable? I did find something while researching Jeri. It seems in August 2008 a lawsuit filed against her by Van Cleef & Arpels for copyright infringement.
Hmmm...interesting.

RHNY: Columbia Schumbia!

"Honestly, if being inauthentic means graduating from Columbia University, writing three books, starting two magazines, bearing two children, being the ambassador for wool, running a marathon for charity -- if that's inauthentic?"






-Kelly Bensimon

Really? You know, I don't mean to split hairs but...
"Kelly went to Columbia University School of General Studies and graduated in 1998." Bensimon's rep said.
According to its Web site, The School of General Studies of Columbia University is a liberal arts college "created specifically for returning and nontraditional students".
Inauthentic? Hmmm...That's such a strong word.
(Source: NYP Pagesix)

RHNY:Jill Zarin Loves Her New Boobs!

Jill Zarin sat down with Life & Style Magazine for an exclusive regarding her recent breast reduction, to bring her 32G-cup chest to a 34DD and was quoted as saying...

"There is no reason anyone should have to suffer from low self-esteem or poor body image," says Jill. "We have the power to change our bodies in a safe and positive way." Here's how and why she did just that.

Am I the only one out there thinking that her face looks a little more refreshed? I'm not talking about the kind of refreshed you get from using Ramona's Tru Renewal skincare either.

Either way, good for her. She's looking fantastic. Let's all thank god she didn't use Kelly's surgeon....

ARGH!

(image via DListed)

To read the complete Life and Style article on Jill's new tetas click here.

RHNY: I Feel Pretty (on the outside)

I stopped by Pretty On The Outside today only to be greeted by the image on the left. Is that not the most hysterically accurate portrait of LuAnn?

"Victoria returned home after having been gone for two months and Luannatic welcomed her back with arms partially open. The daughter greeted her mother with a big hug and a heartfelt, "I missed you!" Mommy CoUNTess Dearest's replied, "You look good" with all the excitement off receiving a jury duty summons. Then Luann Dearest proceeded to snap at her child for not hanging up her coat. "Have... I... Taught... You.... ANYTHING?!!!!" Luannatic screamed as she grabbed the coat and ripped the sleeves off. Okay, I embellish. "

You think that's funny? Click on the image to go see what he said (and drew) with regard to Kelly's party (go to the bathroom first, it's tinkle your pants funny)!

Thanks Gilmore!

RHNY: Whoo's been naughty?

Uh Oh Kelly, seems you've got yet another legal problem. According to the NY Post's Page Six a former college at Elle Accessories is saying this:

"...Celeste Greenberg, who worked at the magazine when Bensimon was editor-in-chief, went on to found accessories line Tuleste Market. According to sources familiar with the matter, while at Elle Accessories, Greenberg had sourced a vintage owl pendant and given it to Bensimon to wear for photo shoots and media appearances. Greenberg allegedly went to Bensimon and struck up a verbal agreement in which the duo would design and manufacture a replica of the owl and split the profits.

But the lawsuit claims that Bensimon instead cut Greenberg out and went ahead and manufactured the pendant on her own. Bensimon currently sells the owl for $325 under her own jewelry line...."

RHNY: Weekly Informercial

Is it me or are you getting a little sick of these product pushing whores and the infomercial that this series has become. I was so annoyed I wasn't even going to talk about them at all this week. Then I figured I would just recap the episode as I remembered seeing it:

We start things off this week with a party Jill holds at Zarin Fabrics for the launch of Zarin Fabrics new Eco-Friendly fabric line.

Ramoaner is launching a skincare line, tru renewal so she meets with the logo designers to look over the packaging and labels they've worked on. She then holds a cocktail party to show off her newest creation tru renewal.





Bethenny is in Connecticut to promote her Bethenny Bakes Vegan Cupcakes, Cookies and Muffins. Lockjaw couldn't pay people to take them. She also manages makes mention of her book Naturally Thin more than a few times throughout the episode.







The countless meets with her co-writer for Class with the Countess.









Kelly is meeting with the co-designer to go over her new Jewelry Line (pronounced: Jewry). The designed all seem to be based upon owls ?!). I'm assuming it's because owls are like rully wise and she's like rully wise because she went to Columbia, written three books, started two magazines, birthed two children, is the ambassador for wool and in her free time run a marathon for charity ! But I digress.






Lastly, Simon takes Alex out and buys her beautiful earrings for her birthday. He then pitches a total temper-tantrum sh*t fit (now we know where France-wah gets it from) when the driver makes a fatal error and "RUINING EVERYTHING! THE SURPRISE IS RUINED!" by driving directly to their hovel of a home instead of going back around out Manhattan through Queens to get to Brooklyn. When they do arrive the beasties are waiting to celebrate Mommies Birthday with her over cupcakes (real yummy looking sugary ones not that cardboard, sawdust, vegan crap Bethenny's shoving down people's gullets). So, despite Simon's time out worthy, inappropriate behavior Team Silex is still my favorite so far this season (I say "still" because I know they're doing that parenting book and they haven't yet started pimping it in earnest).

(photo source: 1-Zarinfabrics.com, 2-ramonasinger.com, 3,4&5- Shopbravo.com, 6-NYmag.com )

RHNY: Rent a House(wife) in the Hamptons.

Breaking news straight from The Real Estalker.

Ramoaner is renting out her Hampton's home next season. Wanna make out with a has-been Playmate by the swimming pool? 300K gets you in from Memorial Day to Labor Day. Click here for all the details.

I'm assuming it's because the Singer's will be summering in St. Barth with the McCord-van Kempens.

RHNY: Oh.My.Gawd(y)!

Well, well, well...Team Jill has it's own photo stream on Flickr. Do you still have any Pepto Bismol left in your bathroom cabinet after watching Jill give Betheney the tour of the Brad-tastic living room, dining room and kitchen at The New Casa de Zarin as seen here on RHNYC ?

Well, go get the Pepto, you're going to need it. Go on, I'll wait.

For the expanded photo tour of The New Casa de Zarin swathed in a sea of Zaaaaaaaarin Faaaaaaaabrics click here.

My two favorites are highlighted below:

Exactly what look do you think Brad was trying to achieve here in the powder room? 'Eccentric Eclectic' perhaps? Thank god there's a toilet in there because being exposed to this atrocity might cause you to toss your cookies.

Brad, I just feel like there's something missing. Maybe individual mini Swarovski crystal candelabras at each place setting or glow in the dark fish bowls to compliment the coral plates or even some Whoopie Cushions on each chair? It just feels so...minimilistic. (Honestly Brad, and I feel like I can be honest with you, it looks like a prop room puked on the table. There. I said it.).

This picture wasn't with The New Casa de Zarin photos but I love it too much not to include it.I'm sure this finger perfectly expresses how Brad and Jill feel with regard to my opinions of The New Casa de Zarin.

Love ya Jill!

(All photo's sourced from Team Jill's Photostream on Flickr.com)

RHNY: Sacked by Saks

Because I know you care...

From Page Six in today's New York Post:

An insider confirmed Saks has "no plans to re-sign" her, but denied that Bensimon's volatile relationship with her ex, Nicholas Stefanov (she was arrested last month for allegedly socking him in the face), had anything to do with it.

Poor Kellamity!

RHNY: What Is Up With These Broads?

Sins of the mother

I'm reading Page Six in The New York Post and they are running a story on Ramona's poor daughter Avery and how she's being shunned by the other little snots at Sacred Heart. The school even asked Ramona to take Avery off the show because they're embarrassed by her actions! Ramona, knowing what's best for her daughter declined.




The Real House-Blight of New York

Tucked down at the bottom of the Page Six Article is a blip about both Kelly Bensimon and The Count-less LuAnn putting their Hamptons homes on the market.

Of course, Your Mama at The Real Estalker never fails to tell it to you first and best. She already has the details up on her blog so I'm deferring to her to give you the scoop! Go!

RHNY: The Jig Is Up

We'd read New York Magazine's article about Countess LuAnn's vulgar shenanigans at a friends the wedding this summer. Yesterday The New York Social Diary sounded a warning shot and now the Page Six article in today's New York Post confirms it. Their marriage is kaput.

I know you must all be distraught and remorseful that a long standing marriage is coming to an end, right? Ha! hardly, come on the guy lives on another continent! Clearly this was the classic marriage of convenience. My guess, she's been looking for an "out" for ages. She'll get to walk away with a nice chunk of change, be able to move her dalliances out from behind closed doors and best of all she gets to play the victim (cue the violins). Everyone will rave about how "She's held her head high in the face of adversity!" "She's handling the split with dignity and grace!" "Her only concern is that of her children!"

We all know the only thing she's really concerned about is the possibility of losing her highly coveted title. After all Countess LuAnn de Lesseps sounds so much better than Ms. LuAnn Nadeau. Aristocracy expert Guy Stair Sainty (how's that for a name?) was already quoted in the July'08 Harper's article as saying, "Many of the Lesseps call themselves count without any right at all." "They ennoble themselves." So clearly there is no shame in LuAnn's game. She is just going to keep on keeping on with her highfalutin self.

Cin-Cin!

(Photo: PatrickMcMullan.com) for NYSD

RHNY: Who are you wearing?

I admit it, I am a BIG time reality TV junkie. A particular favorite is Bravo's Real Housewives of New York City. So when I came across this post The Real Housewives of New York City. Who are you wearing? on one of my favorite blogs Pretty On The Outside I had to share it with you.

You MUST take a look at the signature looks he's created for our ladies. You just have to!